where does one buy neck bolts?

In, broken face news, I got one. I gave myself a nice, Frankenstein-sized scratch on my forehead. How? It’s all about cascading injuries. As noted earlier, I hurt my rinky playing roller hockey. So, when I play hockey, I wear a splint to strengthen/protect it. Well, this makes it difficult to take my mask on and off for quick water breaks. Being unable to grab the mask, I kind of slide it up and down my face. Well, said face caught something scratchy and RIP! Oddly, the day after, no one really asked me about it. I was expecting at least 5 to 10, “Dude, what with your beautiful face?”

Incidentally, because of the disparity between the ice temperature and the air temperature, there was a dense fog throughout the rink. I literally could not see the other goalie. It was like Gorillas in the mist or something, but no Sigourney Weaver to safeguard me.

In society's continual assault against my person news . . .

In noggin news, I took a soccer ball off of my beautiful face last week during our disappointing 3-3 tie (they scored the tying goal with like 3 seconds left). I was running at this dude about 20 yards away from the goal. I was no more than 4 feet from him and he somehow managed to hit me in the face with his shot (?). It was a glancing blow that jostled my eye and contact around a bit. It didn't necessarily hurt, but I felt like Mr. Magoo for a minute there. Anyway, it looks like I’m wearing eye make-up on Lefty. So, I put some eyeliner on Kevin (my right eye – 100 million bonus points if you know this reference) to balance things out. Then I darkened my eyebrows to bring out my baby blues and added a little foundation to even things out and – viola! – I’m a SUPERSTAR!

Or maybe I made up the whole story to hide the fact that theMonica beat me up. And maybe this is a cry for help (waaah, waaah, nudge, nudge).

my finger hurts . . .

The first rule of goalie is OUCH. My freaking pinky! That smarts! Yah, the first rule of goalie is that eventually, you're going to get hit with the puck in every, un/not-as-well-protected spot on your body. The logistics of my pinky strike are probably too convoluted to explain, but I will try nonetheless.

I was reaching with my blocker hand (right) to make a high-ish save. Said blocker hand made the save, but not with the front, rectangular part, but with the leather glove which the blocker is attached too. Even this would have been ok if I hadn't hit the puck on the first knuckle of the pinkie. Further up the finger, there is additional protection, but why would I take advantage of that? Poppycock! Oh well, I can only assume the gods intended for my finger to turn into a sausage. And so it was written and so it shall be.

Now rinky is 40% purple and I have changed his name to Grimace. Fries for everyone.