bingo! or not, I was just bored of sitting here

theMonica and I took my aunt to bingo again tonight. I mean, we took her again in the sense that we've taken her before, but not earlier tonight. You know what I mean.

At any rate, this (you'll never guess) old lady was sitting across from me talking to herself. She wasn't Aunt Batty or anything, just trying to . . . strike up a conversation . . . ? "26. That doesn't do me any good." Loud enough for me to hear, but was it really a comment TO me? I wasn't sure. And I had to calculate that amongst your general bingo population her play-by-play would have been completely inaudible. Was she counting on that? Or did she'd expect I could hear her.

You know me. I didn't say a word. I had like 50 bingo cards to keep track of. I couldn't entertain her inane rumblings.

First intermission came and she went to another table. B!TCH!

there's no yawning in bingo

At least that's what my aunt was telling theMonica after a yawn. Their might not be yawning in bingo, but I'll tell you what there is . . . losing. Lots and lots of losing.

Granted I'm accustomed to losing money, having just done that in Vegas about a month ago. But at least Vegas give you the sweet, sweet taste of a small win in blackjack every once in a while. Bingo is cold. Bingo gives you nothing.

The three of us have been to bingo twice now. None of us have won even a single game. I think I was within one number of winning once (in about 15 games). Most double bingo games I didn't even have a single bingo.

All of this is sad. But the saddest thing of all is that when someone won, there call of "Bingo," was frail and unemotional. Ok, a hundred bucks isn't a life-changing amount of money, but it's better than losing EVERY SINGLE TIME.

I guess the sweet spot for bingo is that first game you win. Bingo, I await your sweetness.