hair today, gone tomorrow

It's that time of year folks. Time for me to let my hair out (of my face) and get prepared for the stiff winds of winter. (Stiff winter winds cause chaffing, you know.) In what has become a personal hygiene tradition of sorts, I grow an amazing technicolor dream beard (red, blonde, brunette, orange hues all accounted for) for the winter and then shave it when baseball season starts. (I think I stole this from Stephen King, along with hella-mad literary skillz - booyah!)

At the same time, theMonica has cut her luxiorous, curly locks. This is indeed, far more traumatic for me than for her. Because really, doesn't it always have to revolve around me? Aesthetically, it matters little as the girl could wear a Ronald McDonald wig and still turn heads and honestly, I can't blame her as if my hair gets beyond an inch and a half I want to cut it down to the scalp. My burden isn't that great when and a lot of the ladies are walking around with pounds and pounds of hair.

Nevertheless, it will take some getting used to. Does anyone know of a children's book written about long hair becoming short? You know, how they have books like, "Tina has Two Mommies," to explain same-sex parenting? That's what I need. "Monica's Hair Doesn't Live Here Anymore." You know, something to soften the blow. Or maybe she could have woven a beard out of her shorn hair and saved me a couple of weeks of growing.